OH MAN THE OLYMPICS

I think that can probably be the beginning and end of all sentiments I've had recently.

That, and how do you organize 2008 people to drum photocopiers while they're dressed like David Bowie? A GOVERNMENT WHO IS WARMING UP TO BURY US WITH THAT TIDAL WAVE EVERYONE TOLD YOU ABOUT, THAT'S WHO.

Man, I wish the internet and I got along a lot better so that I could illustrate both of these points with pictures, because you'd be shooting milk out your nose (s) if I could. Alas and alack, is jus me an my words, and the potentially dangerous and surprisingly compact suspected human cannonball force, that is the Chinese men's gymnastics team.

INSERT SIMILAR PICTURE HERE

You've all been warned, and don't think Michael Phelps is gonna save yo ass.